Parenting Pro-Tips

Pop Quiz
For each question pick the best answer from the choices below.

1)  If you have a toddler who has miraculously potty trained himself a week and a half ago and you catch sight of him standing uncertainly by the toilet while you are washing his brother's hands, should you:

a) Encourage him gently to climb on to the stool, pull down his pants, and pee in the potty, or

b) Shoot him a panicked look and say sharply, "Tristan, I need you to pee right now."

If you chose a), you are correct.

If you chose b), I won't judge you.  After all, your obedient kid is going to be upset enough at you for causing him to pee his pants.

2) You have made tentative plans to meet another mom and her kids after lunch, a time of day that only two months ago was High Holy Nap Time.  When you arrive, one of your three-year-olds throws a fit in the car, repeatedly kicking off his snow boots, crying, and begging to go home.  Should you:

a) Accept that you've bitten off more than you can chew, apologize to the other mom, and drive your tired children and tired self home, or

b)  Tell the child he has to play in an exasperated voice, set him on top of the car in an effort to distract him -- thereby terrifying him -- and force him and his now-crying twin brother into their coats and out into the snow.

The correct answer is a).  If you picked b), you're a jerk.  Trust me, I know.

3) It is 6 am.  You have been up for half an hour.  You've eaten, fed the cats, dealt with some email for work.  Both of your children are still sleeping.  Should you:

a)  Pet your cat and look at design blogs.

b) Exercise.  It's probably your only chance.

c) Get in the shower, quick.

d) Any combination of the above that you can manage.

Obviously, d) is the correct answer here, because you need to do a), b), and c) in equal measure.  However, I can tell you from experience that if you skip straight to c) you're going to be dressed and smell good while you spend a lovely hour after breakfast smashed between two squirmy toddlers reading Laura Ingalls and A. A. Milne.  You may even feel, briefly, that you have a clue what you're doing.